The Screwtape Reports
By Adam Graham
Report #3
From: Dave Screwtape
To: House Democrats, Senate Democrats, Democratic National Committee, Friendly Publications
CC: Texas House Democrats
Subject: We Know We're Fighting A War
Last week's letter was well-received in these troubled times. We are truly winning and I'll continue to explain why.
The second reason we are winning is because we realize we are in a war, not with terrorism, but with the Republican Party. We are winning because the Republicans don't know this.
Consider two separate issues that illustrate my point. First is the delightful performance of the Texas House of Representatives in stopping the passage of Tom Delay's redistricting plan by going to Oklahoma, leaving the House without a quorum, and therefore unable to pass Mr. Delay's scheme.
Right off the bat, let me say that I'm very proud of you all, that's why you're getting this copy of the Screwtape Report for free.
The Republicans would never try a legislative maneuver as clever as abandoning the Capitol to stop a quorum from being present. If they'd tried this in New York or California, we wouldn't have succeeded in passing needed tax increases. If they'd tried it during the Clinton administration, we'd have no assault weapons ban and no Brady law.
One has to be careful that we don't carry this too far, however. I've actually received some e-mails from some of you asking why we don't try to block Bush's agenda by having the required number of congress leave town. It's true that there's a certain appeal to spending your working days in Buenos Aires, drinking margaritas and lounging around while getting paid handsomely to do so. And, I know that appeal's especially strong for you, Senator Kennedy. Unfortunately, none of the government's work could be done. If bills aren't being passed, then government is not growing. This can't be! It would be every Conservative's dream! The turn tale and run maneuver should only be used in times of absolute emergency!
Another example of the different tactics practiced is shown in the current fight over judicial nominees where Senator Daschle and most of our Senators have been doing a great job at stopping so many of President Bush's judicial nominees dead in their tracks.
Filibustering judicial nominees is easy and its painless. Hardly any of the masses will care that the Senate is not acting on some obscure judge. I laugh when I hear conservatives say that failing to confirm Miguel Estrada will cost us the Hispanic vote. If you asked them, most Americans would tell you Miguel Estrada is the star of a soap opera! We'll suffer no political damage for opposing Bush's judges!
Also, the minority in the Senate gets to send a message to the President. "You think it's tough now, wait until you send us a Supreme Court justice!" This increases the likelihood that we'll get a moderate rather than a conservative when the next vacancy occurs.
Republicans don't get it. The Republicans really only put up a fight on two of President Clinton's judges, one because some policemen didn't like her (Shelia Messiah Jackson) and another because John Ashcroft didn't like him (Ronnie White). Other than that, our dear beloved President gained approval for most of his judges save those whose nominations languished during the presidential election. He even managed to appoint two Associate Justices, both with strong liberal backgrounds.
We will never allow someone who is as conservative as Ruth Bader-Ginsburg is liberal on the High Court. Yet, almost every Republican in the Senate blessed her appointment in the 1990s. Of course, if President Bush gets a chance to appoint a justice, we know there's going to be war! Unless that nominee will declare his undying support for legalized abortion, affirmative action, and the overturning of sodomy laws, he will be filibustered.
When a Democrat becomes President, his nominees will be approved by a wide margin as Republicans join hands with us to end the bitter partisanship that has so plagued Washington for many years. They certainly will not filibuster the next Democratic president's nominees for the Supreme Court, rather they will smile and speak of lofty ideals and high principles why we systematically secure the rule of the federal judiciary.
It's not very hard to figure out whose going to win the battle for this country's future. Republicans appoint a mix of moderate and conservative judges and a great number of conservatives are filibustered. We appoint liberals and those who are even more liberal and they are confirmed en masse. Once we get enough seats on the Supreme Court, we'll be able to do whatever we please, because it is through the courts that we will triumph and build political power.
Why are the Republicans this stupid? It's because they have some strange ethics. They're not ethics as we define them (standing up for gay rights and abortion) or ethics as most conservatives define them (living according to great moral principles), rather it is a sense of "honor". "You don't filibuster a President's judicial nominee just because of an ideological disagreement", "You don't stop a legislative body from conducting business because you're going to lose a vote. That's just not done!" The Republicans believe the most important thing they can do is behave in an orderly and dignified manner.
It's similar to British troops in the French and Indian War who would refuse to adapt to frontier fighting tactics, but insisted on lining up single file while their enemies mowed them down. The Republican Army will face a similar fate as they will not adapt to the fact that they're no longer having a beer with Tip O'Neill after insincere political battles, but rather are engaged in a war for this country, a war that they are losing.
Regards,
Dave Screwtape
The Screwtape Report is written by Adam Graham. The Screwtape Report is written from a Democratic perspective by a conservative in order to reveal Democratic strategy and thinking. .
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